OH THANK GOD

Well it's been 11 days since my last entry and I have been to Manchester and back again in that time. Amongst some important conversations and discussions we did manage to have some fun. Sometimes it seems so many issues dont get discussed because its not the kind of thing you do on a chat or on the phone that I feel like volumes of things pile up in order to get discussed face to face. Right from day one I felt like talking about all this stuff, which isnt easy because its SO important and hard to talk about but having done this marriage thing once before, neither one of us is taking it lightly.

One good thing is that I did manage to spend more time with his family and when I say family, it was ALL of them. Great Aunt from Australia who said I had grown a lot (she has Alzheimers) and cousins, sister kids, mom and dad, brother in law and so on and so forth. Me and my blinders had a great time that night speaking Armenian (some of the time) and getting to know my extended family.

I also saw "The Da Vinci Code" and "Mission Impossible III". The DVC caused quite a big discussion as I saw it as pure fiction, or something to "ponder" and S saw it as a conspiracy to weaken the church and faith in general. Again, my blinders and I seem to live a happy life but he does have a point. I thought I was the conspiracy theorist, but it seems we are clones in that department too. God help our kids.

I am (sometimes) easily influenced, especially by people close to me, so it was hard for me to hear some of what S had to say and see things in a darker light. I have looked long and hard for my particular shade of rose-coloured glasses and I am not ready to give them up, nor do I think I can function quite so well without them. I think as people go, I am pretty realistic when it comes to most things but overall I am still quite the optimist. I still think people are generally good inside even if the best of us is still motivated by greed and money at times.

So while S saw the film and book as undermining the faith, religion and the church, I saw it as a theory that if Jesus was just an ordinary man and not a deity, then the message of the book was that all humanity is capable of such great feats and miracles. See what I mean about the glasses now?

Anyhow, as I wrote to my sister, the more I get to know S, the more I like him. Sometimes I really dont like what I hear becasue it shakes my beliefs, but in as many ways as we are alike and will grow together becasue of it, we are polar opposites as well and we will, as a result help each other grow out of our boxes and cast aside our blinders (hopefully).

On a more practical note, I sighed a HUGE sigh of relief today as I found out that my boss Peter can indeed drive Oscar and I to Sofia on the 21st of June. I was holding my breath on that one since I had NO idea whow I would get OB to the airport on a bus. So to that I say "OH THANK GOD!!"

about 48 more hours

and I will be in Manchester again.

But before that I have a mountain of work to do. And it doesnt help that I have been sitting here waiting for our ever-absent librarian who seems to have better things to do than her duties as librarian at all times. I cant even go anywhere till I get these copies. Oh as we say in Armenian "Shnor berav", meaning she has finally put in an appearance (loosly translated).

My kids are writing plays. Its interesting how different the plays are. One is rich with dialogue which would make Samuel Beckett envious, and the other is an avant gard piece with surreal life-sized joints coaxing a weak man to take drugs. I think they will both be brilliant in completely different ways, but the kids dont seem to share my enthusiasm, except when it comes to dressing boys up as girls. Why does cross-dressing have a universal comic appeal? I dont know but I cant wait to see my boys in skirts. HAH! I'm suseptible to it too.

As I said earlier I am getting nostalic. I am also being wooed by the warmth and sunshine here these last few days. Incidentally that is what got me here in the first place. I need to live my last three weeks here fully, make the most of it and tell the people who matter to me how I feel. I may not see them for a long long time, if ever. Oh that hurts.

As much as I would like to write and write I need to go get copies made, and our capable librarian needs to be closely monitored while making copies or else a complete set shall never be!

Nostalgia

Well as per usual, when leaving a place, I become nostalgic about it the last few weeks. I have already been quite nostalgic about my kids, and how much I will miss them. I feel how painful it will be already, but the place itself is starting to do that. Add to that the fact that I just made my apartment really sweet by re-arranging stuff and making it all pretty, and as per usual Im leaving.

Today I was looking out the library window at the top of the hill here, overlooking the town (I really should include a photo shouldnt I?) and I thought "Oh, 5 more weeks and then I will not see this view for many years, if ever.

Unlike Korea I am not killing myself to get out of here. My phsycho boss in Korea sure made it hell for me there the last few months and I couldnt wait to get my feet off that land, but here its different. Here I see so many opportunities, here I have created a bond with so many students and here I felt at home for so much of the time (even if I was really lonely and bored at times). And last but not least, here I made some life-long friends, ones I know I will keep in touch with.

Having been away from Canada for almost three years I know who my real friends are there and I am happy to say there are still a few, and like Canada, only time will tell who my real friends are here. But I have a feeling I already know who they will be, and I promise I will return to see you in not too long.

My dream job

I was searching Workopolis last week and did a different search than usual, and I didnt see much. I looked at page after page of jobs that were hohum and as I was about to give up I thought to myself "Don't be lazy. Look at two more pages. You never know". Lo and behold there it was WWF! looking for someone to manage their photo library, someone with knowledge of photography, video and digital photography, as well as experience in contract writing organizing images in a library and so on.

I got SO excited that I sat down and wrote a letter from the heart. I didnt even think if it was corporate enough and so on and so forth, but I had enough sense not to send it. As a matter of fact I spent the next 5 days working on it. I read and re-read that letter at least 30 times and it metamorphosed into two letters; a cover letter and a personal profile. If I get this job, Im pretty sure I will never have to look for another again.

So for the last week I have been fantasizing about all the things I could do with this job, and how proud I would feel saying I work for the World Wildlife Federation. I icture myself walking into that office on the first day with tears in my eyes. Overdone? Maybe,but its fact. I get teary just thinking about it!

When I was 16 I decided to work for Greenpeace. Somewhere along the way that dream took a back burner, and I wish it never had, because I know this is the real reason Ihave never been satisfied with the jobs I have had. The closest I came was teaching and I do love it and could likely do it the rest of my life quite happily, but this would be far more satisfying on so many levels, especially if I could incorporate teaching into it somehow; such as taking part in school programmes etc.

When I decided to work for an environmental organization I remember speaking to my friend John Miller on the phone about it. He guessed it before I even said it and said "You want to work for the WWF?" and I remember saying "The World Wrestling Federation??? NOOOO I want to work for Greenpeace!" That was when he told me what WWF was. Maybe he made a correct prediction. I truly hope he did.

Some years back WWF took the other WWF to court over the right to use WWF exclusively since the environmental org. had registered the name first. So now the wrestlers are stuck with another abbreviation. But still my studetns had a good laugh when I said I was waiting to hear from WWF for my dream job. Ironically I have donw work for the other WWF already. I had to photograph a fund-raiser for them.

Anyway, here is their site. Have a peek: http://www.wwf.org/

Fatboy Slim

Ive always liked the energy of Fatboy slim. Its the kind of music which would likely send me into one of my head bobbing dances which always leaves me with a sore neck. But this weekend I saw another admirable thing about this band (is it a band or one guy??ME NOT KNOW)

I was channel flicking Sunday looking for something English and though I dont normally watch music videos, I was compelled to stop on VH1 and watch this strange video which turned out to be FBS. It turned out that it was the top 100 best videos of all time and FBS had 2 not one in the top 50. The second included one of my favorite actors Christopher Walken. He is a bit of a freaky looking guy and in this video he was dancing like a fool and doing stunts. It was so funny
that I was laughing out loud in my room.

Look how severe this man looks. Do you see him dancing like a moron on tables?
Anyhow, here is FBS url:http://www.fatboyslim.net/start.htm

DAMMIT!!!!

I just found out Paulo Coelho MY ALL TIME FAVORITE WRITER (Sorry Fay Weldon) is here in Bulgaria doing a book signing as I type this and I cannot attend.

I wrote to him last year after reading "11 Minutes"; a beautiful love story and an inspiring book on so many levels, and he wrote me back on my birthday no less and thanked me for writing him.

I am deeply grieving this lost opportunity but in Canada I will have a chance to meet him I'm sure.

Here is his website: http://www.paulocoelho.com/engl/

His first book The Alchemist is a must read. I have now read 4 of his books and want more. Last one being "On the bank of the river Pierdra I sat down and wept".

Is there anythign better in the world than....

... listening to old REM and baking cookies?

So I had all the ingredients and a recipe for oatmeal chocolate chip cookies, MY FAVE and thought "Why not?" and got baking. I have to say that REMs album Murmur makes beautiful backing music. Oscar was a bit surprised at my jumping around with a blender in my hand, or as Allison calls it "the boat motor" but he seems to like the cookies too so he has no room to complain.

I remember attempting OCC cookies in Korea once in a toaster oven using Korean Soda (very salty as I found out) and Quaker instant oats (also somewhat salty) and it was a laborious disaster to say the least. But these are juuuust fine. I have already confirmed that.

Well there is only so much you can write about cookies. Now that the oven is warm I might make my "easy chocolate cake" too for the kids. Coz they dont get enough sugar drinking Red Bulls for breakfast. I will add to the lethal cocktail and live with the consequences. God help Albena and I!

Roman ruins

Perperikon is the site of ancient ruins in south-western Bulgaria, not too far from Turkey, where I took some really amazing photos and learned that civilization existed here 8000 years ago. Check out http://www.perperikon.bg/

But its at the top of a very loooong climb!

I made it up with my camera bag, huffing and puffing, feeling old and out of shape. All after about 8 hours in a bus, with no food, a couple of coffees and a heck of a lot of noise- 80 students in a bus will do that.

The day was overcast, perfect for slides, and I managed to get up there before most of my students and got some great shots without a hundred people marching through them. I also shot a bunch of 120 black and while and hope to make massive enlargements once I have my darkroom set-up again. Oh when will that be? I wonder if there is even paper still available or has it all gone digital in my three year absence from Photogrpahy.

I got to see another side of my students and colleagues, being outside the school perimeters, but by far what was the saddest thing for me about this trip was seeing all these students smoking! I mean they are 16 and 17. Am I so old that this is uncool to me now? I confiscated quite a number of packs, and am happy to say my star students weren't smoking at all, but the rest, SHAME ON YOU!

There was also the usual drama with students misbehaving, a couple of drunks etc. but that is normal and all in all I'd say it was a well managed group. Or perhaps I have blinders on, which is entirely possible too.

Overall the trip was badly organized but fun. I was glad to spend the time with my kids but mostly glad to be with my teaching partner Albena who I will miss working with. She s a gem and she needs to hear it more I think.

YOU'RE A GEM LADY!